Song
This article is about the annoying sound that people think sounds good. For other uses, please contact the Police and ask them. A 'song '''is a combination of noises to produce a repetitive, loud, annoying object which we tend to call "songs". A song writer, also known as a douchebag, is typically to shy to perform themselves because they are lazy and stupid, so they hire people like Britney Spears and Rihanna (both who obviously auto-tune their voice the best they can to make their music sound ''better) to do the job for them. Lip singing is also common in the performances of songs, because many artists can't sing worth crap and have to pretend like they can. A song is generally lengthed from 1 second to 12 seconds, but some songs have been even longer than two and a half minutes. This record was held by Billy Joel, who managed to sing his favorite cover "Beat It", before he had his 333rd stroke of the day. He performed this in the morning of December 39th, 2 A.D., on his 72nd birthday. The shortest song, held by That Band That No One Knows, was called That Song That No One Knows, which lasted about 0.0000000000003 of a second, measured in nanoseconds. They were awarded the Key to Hell City, Rome, according to That Maganize That No One's Ever Heard Of Before. History First song The first song was created by Jimi Hendrix in the late 1200s. It consisted of Wilds and Things, and some Deeps and Purples. People thought the idea was magnificient, but it peaked at Billboard Hot 100 as #98, as there were already thousands of songs before that were way better and sounded like the person who created them actually put some effort into it, instead of pretending like he couldn't rap, like Jimi Hendrix. Time passed, and songs got better. The song "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star", which debuted at #1 on the Adult Hot 100 tracks, stayed on top for 52 weeks, or one month year. Eventually, it got taken off though because of a remix that a couple of rap artists teamed up and created while driving their Lamborgini in Los Angeles around the 1300s. The remix consisted of the rap artists discrediting the song, stating in an interview: "Well, the song's about peace, man. I mean, you can't write a song without wanting to. And 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star' just couldn't do that." Unfortunately, that was a lie. Some lyrics of the song such as ''Burn in Hell till the Chainsaw Massacre ends! Destroy the schools and burn cemeteries to the ground! ''clearly proved that the song was not about love and wanting to write about something peaceful. Old McDonald A new songwriter, Old McDonald, also known as Adolf Hitler, came out with his debut single in the 1540s which was named after himself. He referred to Concentration camps and Death camps as farms, and the people there as different kinds of barn animals. The tune was stolen from a Gremlin on the road they were passing by. He had told them that the secret to success was "to flick everyone off at the military". After they did it and got chased, they heard the Gremlin singing them a tune, which turned out to be their hit single, which peaked at #2 on the Billboard Hot 100, #4 on the Canadian Hot 100, and #56 on the UK Singles chart, because Simon Cowell said it was terrible, which makes the song automatically get taken fifty numbers back on the charts. In the 1680s In the 1680s, the Beatles, also known as The Bugs, The Insects, The Spiders, and sometimes even The Feretts, released "She's a Man" which topped the charts until ...Baby One More Time arrived, and topped the charts forever and on and on. Or at least I think that's how it went. Genres Songs are categorized into genres, if you didn't know that already. Cuz some people think that there's just "good music" and "bad music" but those people are on crack. Rock :''Main article: Rock music The best genre of them all, rock consists of the totally awesome electric guitar, some hardcore drums, some totally necessary bass, and sometimes a singer. This genre includes people such as Albert Einstein, Christopher Columbus, Aristotle, Isaac Newton, and Brian Greene. All of these people have gotten over 57,000,000 album sales within the passed five minutes. Pop :''Main article: Pop music Oh yes, of course, pop, the kind of music that kids like to listen to. It's okay, it consists of the boring synthesizer, auto-tuned wannabe singers, and electronic/fake drums that don't even ever sound real. The popular pop singers include people like Barack Obama, John Mccain, Sarah Palin, and Joe Biden, all of whom have received #1 hits on the Billboad Hot 100 and the Pop 100 (of course). Rap :''Main article: Rap Oh and let's not forget rap, the other genre that kids listen to. It makes them feel like they're ten years younger, every single one of them. The song broke industry records "because it wanted to" in the late 2000s. Rap has dominated the 2000s era. R&B/Other Oh yes of course there is them. See also *Music